How do you come out.....?

It's funny how we outgrow what we once thought we couldn't live without, and then we fall inlove with what we thought we didn't even wanted. Life keeps leading us on journeys we would never go on if it were up to us. Don't be afraid. Have faith. Find the lesson. 

So, what we I believe, is what I will experience. If I believe there is no magic in life, then I will definitely never experience it. If I believe the miraculous is not real, then I will never accept it when I see it. If I believe I am limited in what I can do, accomplish and become, then I'll always live within the confines of my imagination. 

This has always been one of my biggest struggles and it always left me behind. 

It's really time that we think about our attitudes towards ourselves. Your attitude toward yourselves will continue to be negative because you continue to wait on others for a go-ahead. 

So, if you have been waiting for a sign that tells you which way you should be going, this is it. 

Go straight back to yourself, and know you are amazing, beautiful, and so worthy of your own love, and you don't ever have to wait for someone else to give you permission to dress up, dress done, dream, and fulfill it. 

Like Marianne Williams says:

Our deepest fear is not that we are  inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

In the face of shame

 

There was that broken year, on that broken road, and thank goodness I'm not on that broken road anymore, but I still reminisce sometimes to remind myself what roads not to take. 

I have not been myself for a long time, and even if I pretended not to notice, my subconscious reminds me. Sometimes we abandon ourselves because that's the pattern we've always known, and it's toxic as hell, but we keep doing it. It's hard to understand but sometimes familiar feels like love, and God....

I've been trying to love myself my whole life, and I'm telling you now, the hardest thing I've ever done is unlearn all those patterns and teach ME the right way to love. So many shameful moments. Hand over my face moment. Hands in my hair moments. But all those moments made me realize my many flaws, too many to mention and those flaws are so much larger through my own eyes. But the one flaw that suffocated me slowly was the way I gave too much to other people who only deserved me for a season. There's always been a stubbornness that never allowed me to learn my lesson. That was another in the face of shame moment for me but, NOW I KNOW, LESSON LEARNT!!

Shame is a painful feeling we all experience at one time or another. It often involves a deep-rooted fear that someone is going to find out about a mistake we made or a character flaw we have. When we feel shame, we want to hide from everyone. And it can lead to isolation and suffering. Sometimes the shame has nothing to do with what you did. You did nothing but shame is still there. Shame for me is most evident when someone knows you have a need but they have all the control and it hurts even more when you walk into a room knowing everyone knows that the need you have was cut off just like that. They walk with their head held high and you sit in the face of shame. 

In the face of shame is when people say, "they have no idea how bad they hurt you." yes they do love. They know exactly how bad they hurt you. That's why they had to disappear on you even though you see them everyday still. For them right now it's hard to look at you when they know they've destroyed some part within you. So my darling, don't ever think they don't know how bad they've hurt you. But you my darling, learn to do better. 

If you know you can help someone, no matter the situation, don't ever let that person walk around with shame that's hurting them.